Friday night was very quiet - there was an engagement party in the Labour Club so assuming everybody went there - nobody even came into the pub till about 10.
Rachael and Charlene came in to an empty hall, and at least they stayed about 45 minutes for a wee dance and drink and kept me company lol. Got a txt from Fiona, who decided to go to Irvine (thanks Fi lol) - I did text her back asking if I could go too lol.
Early finish at 1115 which was good for a change, but boring night - made up for last weeks excitement I suppose.
Saturday night was a karaoke disco - a 60th birthday party. Not much hassle at that you would imagine.........
Without dotting the i`s and crossing the t`s ......
1 - The majority of the crowd (roughly 95% I`d say) at this 60th were all under 30
2 - It was a "bring your own bottle" instead of a bar so everybody got pissed quickly with copious amounts of alcohol
3 - Obviously manners were not a strongpoint - as I am trying to take a karaoke request from one person other people just barge in and demand their songs on next
4 - A few of the guests had swallowed a lot more than just alcohol. One guy was totally out of control and kept jumping up and down, bouncing around etc
5 - Early finish at about 1120 as big fight broke out in the street - ambulance and police called - no surprise there
Apparently there is an 18th booked for the same crowd in a fortnight - I`ll be erm, busy, that night.
Sunday, 25 January 2009
Wednesday, 21 January 2009
Jokes
The top 25 rejected children’s book titles.
1. Daddy Drinks Because You Cry
2. Garfield Gets Feline Leukemia
3. What is that Dog Doing to that Other Dog?
4. How to Dress Sexy for Grownups
5. Why Can’t Mr. Fork and Mrs. Electrical Outlet Be Friends?
6. You Were a Mistake
7. Strangers Have the Best Candy
8. The Little Sissy Who Snitched
9. Some Kittens Can Fly!
10. Kathy Was So Bad Her Mom Stopped Loving Her
11. The Children's Guide to Hitchhiking
12. Dad's New Wife John
13. POP! Goes the Hamster...and Other Great Microwave Games
14. 101 Fun Games to Play on the Road
15. Controlling the Playground: Respect Through Fear
16. The Little Golden Book of Electrical Wiring
17. Creatures Under the Bed: a Bedtime Story
18. Making Grown-Up Friends on the Internet
19. Chemistry from Under the Kitchen Sink
20. That’s it; I’m Putting You Up for Adoption
21. The Magic World Inside the Abandoned Refrigerator
22. Your Nightmares Are Real
23. Where Would You Like to be Buried?
24. Timmy’s the Wrong Colour to be Your Friend
25. I Dare You! 101 Challenges to Prove You’re Not a Sissy
********
A blonde, wanting to earn some money, decided to hire herself out as a handyman-type and started canvassing a wealthy neighborhood. She went to the front door of the first house and asked the owner if he had any jobs for her to do.
“Well, you can paint my porch. How much will you charge?”
The blonde said, “How about £50?” The man agreed and told her that the paint and ladders that she might need were in the garage. The man’s wife, inside the house, heard the conversation and said to her husband, “Does she realize that the porch goes all the way around the house?”
The man replied, “She should. She was standing on the porch.”
A short time later, the blonde came to the door to collect her money.
“You’re finished already?” he asked. “Yes,” the blonde answered, “and I had paint left over, so I gave it two coats. “Impressed, the man reached in his pocket for the £50. “And by the way,” the blonde added, “that’s not a porch, it’s a Ferrari.”
**********
There was a boy praying at night and he says "God bless mommy, daddy, grampa, and good-bye uncle fred". And the next day uncle fred died tragically by getting hit by a mac
truck. So the next night at prayertime, the boy says "God bless mommy, daddy, and good-bye grampa". The next day, grampa was playing golf and was hit by lightning and then was drug out to the 18th hole and he died. The next night people were getting real worried. At prayertime, the boy says, "God bless mommy and good-bye daddy". Well, the next day the father was especially careful and when he got home, his wife was crying. He asked, "Honey, what's wrong?". She said, "The postman is lying dead on the front doorstep!".
1. Daddy Drinks Because You Cry
2. Garfield Gets Feline Leukemia
3. What is that Dog Doing to that Other Dog?
4. How to Dress Sexy for Grownups
5. Why Can’t Mr. Fork and Mrs. Electrical Outlet Be Friends?
6. You Were a Mistake
7. Strangers Have the Best Candy
8. The Little Sissy Who Snitched
9. Some Kittens Can Fly!
10. Kathy Was So Bad Her Mom Stopped Loving Her
11. The Children's Guide to Hitchhiking
12. Dad's New Wife John
13. POP! Goes the Hamster...and Other Great Microwave Games
14. 101 Fun Games to Play on the Road
15. Controlling the Playground: Respect Through Fear
16. The Little Golden Book of Electrical Wiring
17. Creatures Under the Bed: a Bedtime Story
18. Making Grown-Up Friends on the Internet
19. Chemistry from Under the Kitchen Sink
20. That’s it; I’m Putting You Up for Adoption
21. The Magic World Inside the Abandoned Refrigerator
22. Your Nightmares Are Real
23. Where Would You Like to be Buried?
24. Timmy’s the Wrong Colour to be Your Friend
25. I Dare You! 101 Challenges to Prove You’re Not a Sissy
********
A blonde, wanting to earn some money, decided to hire herself out as a handyman-type and started canvassing a wealthy neighborhood. She went to the front door of the first house and asked the owner if he had any jobs for her to do.
“Well, you can paint my porch. How much will you charge?”
The blonde said, “How about £50?” The man agreed and told her that the paint and ladders that she might need were in the garage. The man’s wife, inside the house, heard the conversation and said to her husband, “Does she realize that the porch goes all the way around the house?”
The man replied, “She should. She was standing on the porch.”
A short time later, the blonde came to the door to collect her money.
“You’re finished already?” he asked. “Yes,” the blonde answered, “and I had paint left over, so I gave it two coats. “Impressed, the man reached in his pocket for the £50. “And by the way,” the blonde added, “that’s not a porch, it’s a Ferrari.”
**********
There was a boy praying at night and he says "God bless mommy, daddy, grampa, and good-bye uncle fred". And the next day uncle fred died tragically by getting hit by a mac
truck. So the next night at prayertime, the boy says "God bless mommy, daddy, and good-bye grampa". The next day, grampa was playing golf and was hit by lightning and then was drug out to the 18th hole and he died. The next night people were getting real worried. At prayertime, the boy says, "God bless mommy and good-bye daddy". Well, the next day the father was especially careful and when he got home, his wife was crying. He asked, "Honey, what's wrong?". She said, "The postman is lying dead on the front doorstep!".
Monday, 19 January 2009
Sunday Fun Day
Sunday is usually day of rest ........
Woke up pretty early as is the usual, and realised ive got housework to catch up on. So did a few washings, cleaned the kitchen, the bathroom, tidied up etc etc.
While doin the dishes I left the water running while I was cleaning my wok then filled the basin. Cue rather large banging noise from the boiler, followed by a jet of steam out the top like Thomas on a bad day!
Oops - so - switched it off and went to the phone. The guy came out to see it and of course it wouldnt act up for him at all, so he gave it a good check and seemed to think its ok. Touch wood its not done much more so just need to watch that in future.
Picked Scott up and went for a meal in Morris`s, as I hadn`t been out for my Birthday. As usual, Gordon did the business and we didnt even need puddings - we were both well and truly stuffed. Then down to Bar One for the Karaoke with Andy C. Quiet night all round, apart from my friend Kirsty coming in and being her loud and boysterious self. Shes so quiet when shes working in the Hydro.
Came home and started chatting to someone on Bebo / MSN who lives up the road. Chatted for hours, and meeting up tonight so who knows what will happen.
Ta ta
Woke up pretty early as is the usual, and realised ive got housework to catch up on. So did a few washings, cleaned the kitchen, the bathroom, tidied up etc etc.
While doin the dishes I left the water running while I was cleaning my wok then filled the basin. Cue rather large banging noise from the boiler, followed by a jet of steam out the top like Thomas on a bad day!
Oops - so - switched it off and went to the phone. The guy came out to see it and of course it wouldnt act up for him at all, so he gave it a good check and seemed to think its ok. Touch wood its not done much more so just need to watch that in future.
Picked Scott up and went for a meal in Morris`s, as I hadn`t been out for my Birthday. As usual, Gordon did the business and we didnt even need puddings - we were both well and truly stuffed. Then down to Bar One for the Karaoke with Andy C. Quiet night all round, apart from my friend Kirsty coming in and being her loud and boysterious self. Shes so quiet when shes working in the Hydro.
Came home and started chatting to someone on Bebo / MSN who lives up the road. Chatted for hours, and meeting up tonight so who knows what will happen.
Ta ta
Saturday, 17 January 2009
Karma
Back to Morgans tonight, and it was a relatively quiet affair for most of the night.
Then some guy comes in - wasted - and started giving me grief. He was asking for totally unsuitable music to be played and was one of these "not taking no for an answer" kinda folk.
After repeated shoutings at by the stewards and also the bar staff, he seemed to clam down.
End of the night and he started up again, then left of his own accord. Yay.
On leaving the bar and getting paid, I happened to glance at the CCTV and watched said idiot being beaten up by a few folk for shouting his mouth off. He ended up with a rather mashed up face, which was justly deservered I say.
What goes around comes around.
Then some guy comes in - wasted - and started giving me grief. He was asking for totally unsuitable music to be played and was one of these "not taking no for an answer" kinda folk.
After repeated shoutings at by the stewards and also the bar staff, he seemed to clam down.
End of the night and he started up again, then left of his own accord. Yay.
On leaving the bar and getting paid, I happened to glance at the CCTV and watched said idiot being beaten up by a few folk for shouting his mouth off. He ended up with a rather mashed up face, which was justly deservered I say.
What goes around comes around.
Wednesday, 14 January 2009
Ooft!!!
OK OK yeah I know - not done an update for a while.
Excuse is - today is my Birthday so I`m getting old and forgetfull :)
Anyways back to the blog. Last weeks fun and games ......
Friday was back in Morgans, which was novel as I have not been in there for a while. Scott wasnt working so took him and Robert along for company. A very weird crowd in (all bar Fiona of course, but more on her later!), and for once, stewards on the door! Was quite relieved to see one of the stewards was Louise, someone from my deep and distant past when I was DJ at Castle Wee Rock. not seen her in ages and was great to catch up on stuff, even though we were working.
Saturday night was in West Kilbride Golf Club, and a black tie affair, with their yearly party. Was a truly fantastic night spoiled only in part by a woman who sneered at me all the time at the start of the evening as I didnt have anybody dancing. It was the start of the night dear, you were still getting pissed! Needless to say, soon got her, and everybody else dancing, and truly turned out to be without doubt the best party I`ve done all year ;)
Anyways - I showed Fiona my blog and she now has decided to do one herself - link is on the right hand side above the Pacman :) Should be an interesting read when shes sober, and an even more interesting one when shes drunk ;) I do hope she has the willpower to keep it going as it will turn out to be better than reading the local paper for gossip ;)
Im away back to my complan and knitting.
Excuse is - today is my Birthday so I`m getting old and forgetfull :)
Anyways back to the blog. Last weeks fun and games ......
Friday was back in Morgans, which was novel as I have not been in there for a while. Scott wasnt working so took him and Robert along for company. A very weird crowd in (all bar Fiona of course, but more on her later!), and for once, stewards on the door! Was quite relieved to see one of the stewards was Louise, someone from my deep and distant past when I was DJ at Castle Wee Rock. not seen her in ages and was great to catch up on stuff, even though we were working.
Saturday night was in West Kilbride Golf Club, and a black tie affair, with their yearly party. Was a truly fantastic night spoiled only in part by a woman who sneered at me all the time at the start of the evening as I didnt have anybody dancing. It was the start of the night dear, you were still getting pissed! Needless to say, soon got her, and everybody else dancing, and truly turned out to be without doubt the best party I`ve done all year ;)
Anyways - I showed Fiona my blog and she now has decided to do one herself - link is on the right hand side above the Pacman :) Should be an interesting read when shes sober, and an even more interesting one when shes drunk ;) I do hope she has the willpower to keep it going as it will turn out to be better than reading the local paper for gossip ;)
Im away back to my complan and knitting.
Sunday, 4 January 2009
21st`s - and how they should be done!
Last night was a 21st for Natalie, a friend of my friend Robyn.
Done many parties for the crowd that revolve around them both, be it 21st`s or just in pubs etc, so I knew that the night would be quite fun.
Natalie texts me the night before with her playlist, all new stuff and danc and R&B - good good.
Start of the party with chart and some dance and as per usual, nobodys drunk (Including Robyn, although she made up for that later poor girl - Thanks go to Megan for taking her home lol).
As usual, the "parents and other family" sat at the far end of the hall, as far away as could be from the disco.
I always like to mix the music up and play older stuff for the older crowd etc, but everybody was having a good time dancing to the new stuff so figured I would leave it till requested. Eventually the mother came up and I expected the usual "put on a few old ones". No. Instead I got "play more dance music, this is great".
What a turn up lol. The slowest / oldest song I played all night was Alice DJ - Better Off Alone, and the hardest dance track, which I was reluctant to play as its quite heavy, but as soon as it was on I could hear at least 5 people shout its name. Dyewiteness - Masterplan.
Also at the end the mother came up and couldnt believe we had finished. As she said "theres no houses nearby, lets make some noise" (the hall is a sports club in the middle of nowhere!).
An amazing night. Cant wait to do her 25th :)
PS - Natalie - u looked good as well ;) At least nobody danced like that guy in the Basebowl lol
Done many parties for the crowd that revolve around them both, be it 21st`s or just in pubs etc, so I knew that the night would be quite fun.
Natalie texts me the night before with her playlist, all new stuff and danc and R&B - good good.
Start of the party with chart and some dance and as per usual, nobodys drunk (Including Robyn, although she made up for that later poor girl - Thanks go to Megan for taking her home lol).
As usual, the "parents and other family" sat at the far end of the hall, as far away as could be from the disco.
I always like to mix the music up and play older stuff for the older crowd etc, but everybody was having a good time dancing to the new stuff so figured I would leave it till requested. Eventually the mother came up and I expected the usual "put on a few old ones". No. Instead I got "play more dance music, this is great".
What a turn up lol. The slowest / oldest song I played all night was Alice DJ - Better Off Alone, and the hardest dance track, which I was reluctant to play as its quite heavy, but as soon as it was on I could hear at least 5 people shout its name. Dyewiteness - Masterplan.
Also at the end the mother came up and couldnt believe we had finished. As she said "theres no houses nearby, lets make some noise" (the hall is a sports club in the middle of nowhere!).
An amazing night. Cant wait to do her 25th :)
PS - Natalie - u looked good as well ;) At least nobody danced like that guy in the Basebowl lol
Saturday, 3 January 2009
Stolen Jokes
Stolen from a friends Bebo page but worthy nonetheless:
A recent study conducted by Glasgow University found that the average Scotsman walks about 900 miles a year.
Another study by the scottish Medical Association found that Scotsmen drink, on average, 22 gallons of alcohol a year.
This means, on average, Scotsmen get about 41 miles to the gallon.
Kind of makes you proud to be scottish!
A recent study conducted by Glasgow University found that the average Scotsman walks about 900 miles a year.
Another study by the scottish Medical Association found that Scotsmen drink, on average, 22 gallons of alcohol a year.
This means, on average, Scotsmen get about 41 miles to the gallon.
Kind of makes you proud to be scottish!
Thursday, 1 January 2009
Merry New Easter!
Happy Easter!!!
No? Well it soon will be - creme eggs are in the shops already!!
So - Happy 2009 to all you readers. Hopefully it will be better than 2008 in many ways, financially more than anything.
Hogmany party in the Cotton Mill was on a usual par of excellence. A few unhappy punters with the restaurant purely as they couldnt cook food fast enough for the gannets to eat. The kitchen staff were run off their feet but yet the customers were moaning. Wheres the season of goodwill - these folk are working on Hogmany (myself included) just so you have a good enjoyable night.
Once I got set up and started the party kicked into full swing, with a packed floor all night. One woman almost walked out when she heard me say last orders was at 1145, to allow the bar staff time to get a drink. She did chirp up however when I informed her the bar reopened at 1215 lol.
Finished at 1, then headed to the Bar One to pick up Scott, who had a mobbed night in the bar till 12 when everybody sodded off to the Metro. Even Lee though the back had the same problem. I dunno what it is about the magnetism of the Metro. All it needs is sawdust on the floor and it truly can be classed a cattle market.
So - what will 2009 bring? I have no idea. Just go along for the ride and find out :)
No? Well it soon will be - creme eggs are in the shops already!!
So - Happy 2009 to all you readers. Hopefully it will be better than 2008 in many ways, financially more than anything.
Hogmany party in the Cotton Mill was on a usual par of excellence. A few unhappy punters with the restaurant purely as they couldnt cook food fast enough for the gannets to eat. The kitchen staff were run off their feet but yet the customers were moaning. Wheres the season of goodwill - these folk are working on Hogmany (myself included) just so you have a good enjoyable night.
Once I got set up and started the party kicked into full swing, with a packed floor all night. One woman almost walked out when she heard me say last orders was at 1145, to allow the bar staff time to get a drink. She did chirp up however when I informed her the bar reopened at 1215 lol.
Finished at 1, then headed to the Bar One to pick up Scott, who had a mobbed night in the bar till 12 when everybody sodded off to the Metro. Even Lee though the back had the same problem. I dunno what it is about the magnetism of the Metro. All it needs is sawdust on the floor and it truly can be classed a cattle market.
So - what will 2009 bring? I have no idea. Just go along for the ride and find out :)
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